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Matter of the Heart | Better Together | Chris Hodges

Sunday, February 16



Scriptures 

Proverbs 4:23; Matthew 19:8; Ephesians 1: Exodus 28:29-30; Genesis 11:27-32; II Corinthians 3:18 

Key Points 

  1. Reverse the curse. If you’ve been through trauma or bad experiences that have changed you for the worse, you must learn to reverse the curse. It’s time to allow God to write new names on your heart. 
  2. Don’t settle in your heartbreak. To get from where you are to where God is calling you, you must overcome the trauma, insecurity, heartbreak, and anything else you have been through that is prohibiting you. Don’t settle for anything less. 
  3. You need a mirror moment. When you draw near to God, He will give you a glimpse of who you could be. The essence of the gospel is to change, and if you want to be transformed into the potential God sees, you must allow God to change you. 
  4. Go “All In” for God. You will never get the fullness of what God has for your life as a “Sunday Christian;” you must go all in with God and let God’s purpose replace your pain. 

Laying the Foundation 

There is an old nursery rhyme that says: “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but word can never hurt me.”  While it may be something we teach our kids to try to comfort them, the truth is that words can and do hurt. The Bible teaches us in Pr. 18:21 “The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.” (NLT). Words have more power than we attribute them. We are often shaped by the words spoken to us or about us. 

  • Share one thing that someone spoke into your life (good or bad) that you remember to this day. How did it make you feel?  What effect did it have on your life and/or self-image? 

Introduction  

Proverbs 4:23 NIV 

”Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” 

Pastor Chris Hodges shared this week the challenges we face in relationships based upon the filters we view life through. He pointed out that our perspective in relationships is frequently not based upon objective facts, as much as the filters we view them through. Our heart is the source of our identity and, as such, is also the source of our attitudes, perspectives and actions that we express toward others. It is therefore imperative that we guard our hearts above all else, not just with regard to what we allow into our hearts, but also with regard to what we allow to come out of our hearts. 

Pastor Hodges called attention to structure that God gave Aaron when establishing his role as the high priest.  

(Exodus 28:29-30 NIV) Whenever Aaron enters the Holy Place, he will bear the names of the sons of Israel over his heart on the breast-piece of decision as a continuing memorial before the LORD. Thus, Aaron will always bear the means of making decisions for the Israelites over his heart before the LORD. 

Exodus describes one piece of high priestly garb with great detail. It is described as the breastplate of decision. On it was 12 stones and names, each one representing one of the tribes of Israel. It was to be worn over his chest, or more specifically his heart. This was established to remind Aaron, and all of the high priests to come, that the decisions that would be made on a spiritual level were to be filtered through the perspective of his God-given responsibility to represent all of the people before the Lord. 

In today’s content we will be focusing on these three areas: 

  • Getting stuck in the past 
  • Seeing yourself with unveiled faces 
  • Change is the essence of the Gospel 

As we continue to build out marriages and relationships, it becomes more essential that we are conscientious about how we view ourselves and others and why we view them this way. We are not defined by what we have done or what has been said about us by others. We are defined by what Jesus has done for us and what God says about who we are.  

Stuck in Past Wounds 

 Pastor Chris Hodges asked thought-provoking questions: “How’s your heart? What’s going on inside?” He explained that our reactions to offenses often stem from past experiences—good or bad—filtering how we interpret life. In relationships, it’s not just the disagreement that matters, but something deeper tied to our heart’s condition.  

He said we make decisions based on what was “written” on our hearts when we were young, by people of significance. This shapes how we see ourselves and can limit our progress, often through an “I can’t” lens due to past failures, fear of rejection, or harsh words spoken over us. Our actions reflect what’s written on our hearts, filtering our choices.  

Genesis 11:27-32- “27 This is the account of Terah’s family line. Terah became the father of Abram, Nahor and Haran. And Haran became the father of Lot. 28 While his father Terah was still alive, Haran died in Ur of the Chaldeans, in the land of his birth. 29 Abram and Nahor both married. The name of Abram’s wife was Sarai, and the name of Nahor’s wife was Milkah; she was the daughter of Haran, the father of both Milkah and Iskah. 30 Now Sarai was childless because she was not able to conceive. 31 Terah took his son Abram, his grandson Lot son of Haran, and his daughter-in-law Sarai, the wife of his son Abram, and together they set out from Ur of the Chaldeans to go to Canaan. But when they came to Harran, they settled there. 32 Terah lived 205 years, and he died in Harran.” 

Pastor Hodges pointed to Terah, Abraham’s father, who left Ur for Canaan but stopped in Haran and died there (Genesis 11:27-32). Some believe Terah settled in Haran because it shared the name of his deceased son, trapping him in grief.  

  • What role did you play in your family growing up?  
  • What did you dream of being as a kid?  
  • What’s written on your heart that shapes how you think and act?   

Many of us live out what others wrote on our hearts long ago. 

Spiritual Identity Theft 

Spiritual identity theft happens when we accept someone's opinion of us, harsh words spoken in vulnerability, or see ourselves negatively due to repeated failures or circumstances. It occurs when we believe anything other than how God sees us. It's said we have some of God, but not all; and God has some of us, but not all. 

Ephesians 2:10 (ESV) For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”  

  • Who do you say or think you are? Who do you think you should be or what do you want to be like? 
  • Reflect on the question 'Who does God say I am?' How does this answer differ from how you might describe yourself, and how does it change your daily interactions? 

How we view ourselves shapes our actions. 

Seeing Yourself with Unveiled Faces 

How do we get away from the names branded on us? 

Pastor Hodges told of another story of a child who was kidnapped and left in a Colombian jungle – she was not rescued for ten years. She found herself surrounded by monkeys and learned how to survive through their modeling life. It wasn’t until she discovered a mirror in the jungle and upon investigation, she determined she was not a monkey. She was never satisfied with jungle life again.  

In 2 Corinthians 3:18, we see that “And we all having been unveiled in face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image, from glory to glory, even as from the Lord, the Spirit.” 

Glory is defined as honor, renown, glory, an especially divine quality, the unspoken manifestation of God, and splendor. It often refers to the weightiness and honor of God's presence. 

As we surrender, God edits our past, rewriting and transforming us. One day, we'll see His reflection, not our own. Allow Him To transform You. Allow the Lord to help you find your gifts and purpose in life.  

Don’t live out a label someone put on you. Experience the freedom that Christ paid for you! 

  • How does the story of the child in the jungle illustrate the concept of spiritual identity? What can we learn from her discovery of the mirror? 
  • Based on 2 Corinthians 3:18, how can we practically apply the idea of 'beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord' in our daily lives to transform our self-view? 
  • What does it mean to you to surrender to God's transformation? Share an example of a time when you felt God 'rewriting' your past or identity. 

Acknowledge God's role in your life and surrender to His will. Consider your thoughts, actions, and how they align with God's love and grace. Trust in God to see your value and purpose. 

Activity 

Q: Is there a word or words that were written on your heart? Is it ‘failure’, ‘dumb,’ ‘clumsy,’ ‘selfish,’ ‘lazy’ or ‘just like your ___’?   

  1. Get a piece of paper. Draw a line down the middle. Print the names or words that were spoken over you (and subsequently written on your heart) down the left side of the paper. Leave a good amount of space under each name or word.
  2. Under each name or word, ask the Lord to show you what ‘filters’ or ways of being/acting came into being as a result
    1. i.e. when ___________ happens I typically do/say/think _______ and I know it’s because whatever was just said or done by someone else isn’t the real issue. The real issue is something deeper – in me. 
  3. On the right side of the paper, opposite each word/name on the left, ask the Lord what names He has given you or words He has spoken to you. If you have no words on the right side of the paper, a good exercise will be to get in His word more and let Him speak to you.
  4. Come out of agreement and renounce the words on the left side of the paper that were written on your heart by others and ask the Lord to forgive you for believing those lies and not believing His word. Ask the Lord to forgive the people who spoke those words over you. You must also forgive them.
  5. Literally cross out the names/words on the left side of the paper that you have been living under that are not from God. Replace them with the names/words the Lord gives you and intentionally walk those out.
  6. Ask the Lord to continue to show you any fears, lies, self-deceptions, strongholds, demonic/idolatry altars that got established based on the names/words on the left side of the paper.

Q: Have you ever made a vow such as “I’ll never be like _____,” “I’ll never do ________”?   

Follow much the same pattern as above.   

   a. Identify the vows or oaths   

   b. See if they line up to God’s word   

   c. Come out of agreement with anything ungodly. Renounce it.   

   d. Confess/ask for forgiveness   

   e. Forgive anyone else who participated in it   

   f. Turn and do not come into agreement with any of them again. 

Change is the Essence of the Gospel 

Healing starts with stepping into the truth of who we are in Christ. Which requires with us releasing past mistakes, regrets, and burdens. Just as nature renews with the changing seasons, our hearts and minds are renewed in Christ. These verses are reminders that we are not bound by our past. Our old self marked by mistakes, pain, and brokenness has been cast aside and we are invited to a new life.  

2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV): “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” 

Renewal is not just a one-time event but is continuous. Each day, God is at work within us, healing wounds we thought would never fade and restoring areas we believed were too broken. With time when we embrace our new identity, we can then find freedom from the burdens of our former life and step into the healing power of Christ’s love.  

  • Reflect on 2 Corinthians 5:17. How does the concept of being a 'new creation' influence your daily life? Can you share a personal experience where you felt this renewal? 

These are the moments that heal-the moments when we say yes to God’s transformation and trade our brokenness for His wholeness. 

Colossians 3:9-10 (NIV): “Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.” 

Each moment with Christ is a fresh start. His grace heals and guides us forward. Pray, surrender your burdens, embrace God's newness, and shed old habits or mindsets. Walk in the life Christ provides, trusting in His renewing love. Despite past scars, every day is new in Him. 

  • Considering Colossians 3:9-10, discuss how the continuous process of renewal in Christ affects your interactions with others. How can we practically support each other in this transformation journey? 

Conclusion 

By changing how we see ourselves and others through the lens of faith, we can achieve more in our personal lives and relationships. To do this, follow these four steps: 

#1: Go all in with God. 

To be fully sanctified by God, we must surrender completely, not just the convenient parts. Withholding areas of our lives often leads to our biggest personal and relational issues. Prioritize your commitment to God above all else to avoid compartmentalizing your faith. 

#2: Finally deal with my issues. 

Committing to Jesus allows us to see ourselves through His eyes, tackling guilt and reversing curses. His love grants freedom and makes what seemed impossible now possible, turning barriers into doors through His sacrifice. 

#3: Discover my real purpose in life. 

Sanctified by Jesus, we find our true purpose by shifting focus from ourselves to serving in God's kingdom. Our purpose aligns with His when we seek our role in His plans, harnessing His power through the Holy Spirit for effectiveness in His work. 

#4: Give my life to something that matters. 

Living wholly for God involves dedicating yourself to the opportunities He presents, especially through relationships. Prioritize loving your spouse, children, or neighbors as an expression of God's love, living intentionally and with purpose. 

Focus this week on making sure that the only thing that is filtering what comes into or goes out of your heart is from the Lord. Look for opportunities to full your role in God’s purposes. 

  • What is one biblical truth that you will hold onto this week to filter what comes in or goes out of your heart? 
  • Name one person that you can show some word of encouragement or act of kindness to. What will you do for them or say to them? 

Resources 

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