That One Word | Mark Rutland
Sunday, February 4
Introduction
Thank you for joining our Bible study focused on Dr. Mark Rutland's insightful message derived from Ephesians 5:18-33. I'd like to emphasize that while our conversation will explore themes of marriage and singleness, our exploration will extend further to encompass various biblical teachings. In today's session, we will not only reflect on key points from Sunday's sermon based on Ephesians chapter 5 but also delve into additional aspects that this chapter illuminates.
This passage presents a profound exploration of Christian living, focusing on the Spirit-filled life, mutual submission, and the roles within marriage that reflect Christ's relationship with the church.
While the passage addresses married couples, its principles apply to all relationships, including those of single individuals, by emphasizing the Spirit's influence in our lives and our interactions with others.
- What were your thoughts on Sunday’s message?
Let’s read an overview of the Scripture passage we will be looking at today.
Overview of Ephesians 5:18-33
In this passage, Paul contrasts the effects of being drunk with wine with being filled with the Holy Spirit. He encourages believers to live wisely and make the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. The key to understanding this scripture is recognizing that a Spirit-filled life results in mutual submission, joyful worship, and thankfulness. For married couples, this means wives should respect their husbands as the church submits to Christ, and husbands must love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church.
Great! Now let’s read it from beginning to end. [Ask for volunteers to read a few verses at a time.]
Ephesians 5:18-33 NIV18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Breaking It Down (Ephesians 5:18-21)
Now let’s break down the passage into small segments and discuss the principles of each verse.
Paul shows us that being filled with the Spirit leads to self-control, joy, thankfulness, and mutual submission. Living under the Spirit's influence encourages a lifestyle of singing, making music, giving thanks, and submitting to one another.
18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
- What does it mean to be filled with the Holy Spirit, and how can we seek this in our daily lives? (Eph. 5:18)
- Discuss the four by-products of the Spirit’s influence mentioned in the passage. How can we cultivate these in our community? (Eph. 5:19-20)
- Discuss the importance of speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs as evidence of the Spirit's influence. What does this practically look like today?
Ephesians 5:21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Ephesians 5:21 was the central verse used by Dr. Rutland on Sunday. He pointed out that submission is often misunderstood but is essential for Spirit-filled living and marriage. There are words with an emotional impact far beyond their definition. “Submission” is a word many people have learned to dislike because of how it’s been taught. So, what is biblical submission? Like submitting a term paper at the end of a class, submission means to give; that’s what it’s all about.
- How can individuals contribute to and benefit from a community that practices mutual submission and love? (Eph. 5:21)
- If marriage “should be a race to outgive one another,” how does that apply to all other relationships?
At this point in the passage, the instruction by Paul shifts toward the marriage context. For those not married, there is something still to be learned. Read on.
Breaking It Down (Ephesians 5:22-33)
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Here are some principles and questions about marriage and singleness derived directly from the Scripture passage and Dr. Rutland’s message. Share any thoughts you may have:
Marriage:
- The secret of marriage and spiritual life is selfless giving, as exemplified by Christ.
- Mutual submission, not rules, makes a marriage work.
- Reflect on the statement "Marriage is a race to outgive one another." How does this perspective shift the focus from receiving to giving in relationships?
Singleness:
- Singleness is also a gift and a time to focus on one's relationship with God.
- How can single individuals practice the principle of mutual submission in their relationships with others? (Eph. 5:21)
- In what ways can singleness be viewed as a gift for focusing more fully on one's walk with God?
Questions For Married Couples
- Discuss practical ways wives can show respect to their husbands, and husbands can demonstrate love to their wives. (Eph. 5:22-33)
- How can couples practice mutual submission in their marriage? Share examples. (Eph. 5:21)
- In what ways can the principles of sacrificial love and mutual submission improve communication and resolve conflicts in marriage? (Eph. 5:25-28)
Closing Questions
- Why is it fitting that a passage about marriage start off talking about being filled with the Spirit?
- What are other themes of Ephesians 5:18-33 that stand out to you? (Examples: filled with Spirit, submission, conduct with one another, marriage roles, Christ’s sacrifice, etc.)
- How does a Spirit-filled life contrasts sharply with one controlled by substances or selfish desires?
- The command to be filled with the Spirit is ongoing and involves continuous replenishment. Looking at your life in a typical week, give a few examples of what it means to be filled with the Spirit. How would you say you do at that? What needs to change?
Closing Reflection
Let's reflect on how the Holy Spirit's filling can transform our relationships, promoting a lifestyle of love, submission, and mutual respect. Whether married or single, we are called to live out these principles in all our interactions, reflecting Christ's love and submission to the Father.
As we conclude, consider how you can apply these teachings to your life this week. Let's pray for the Spirit's guidance to live out these principles in our relationships.
Closing Prayer
Feel free to ask for and write down prayer needs as well.
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